"Clicking Off?"

[Bubbles Galore]

My wife says I have a hard time 'clicking off'. Besides the car wash, we have a personalized budget planning website and I am an engineering tech at a medical manufacturer.

My time spent awake is time that is spent working. It's what I'm good at.

When I take her out to dinner, I want to talk about the wash or the website. When I am at home, I am working on the site or playing on the forum =) We have made it a habit to have a date night once a week to "try" and distance ourselves from the businesses, but even she will inadvertantly bring them up.

I guess what I'm asking is if anyone else has that same issue? Do you find your every waking thought to be about your business, whatever it may be?

I'm at work on lunch right now and all I can focus on is the wash or the website.

 

[bigleo48]

Bubbles,

I hear you...I too work full time as a Manager in Telecom. Life is always a struggle for time & money, you either have one or the other and the trick is to have both.

I guess you wife is wearing from the grind. As your life partner, it's her job to try and keep you balanced and help you if you stray.

I'm good at those things too, but I work diligently at fitting my family in and spending time with them. That's whats most important to me.

It's hard to click off work life and so during dinner I focus on the kids and my wife's day (almost always more interesting than mine) and frequently talk about the future and where we are going. Kinda puts things in perspective.

Clicking off now....BigLeo

 

[pitzerwm]

I read an article last year that 95% of entrepreneurs are ADD. I thought about that for awhile and it began to explain why I did what I did 25 businesses in 30 years, plus the 24/7 life. I found an ADD test and took it, I answered yes to 19 out of the 20 questions. That might explain your life too.

 

[Jeff_L]

I started taking the ADD test, after question 3 I got bored and moved on to something else.

 

[Bubbles Galore]

^hahaha

I don't know. The majority of my friends/family don't understand why I am the way I am. My wife only worries because she thinks I'm going to spontaneously combust one day. I have never believed in doing anything half-*ssed, maybe that's why I'm nuts.

The simplest explanation is ADD though.

 

[Waxman]

The most important thing I have tried to implement in daily life is focused attention.

It sounds new agey but humans are meant to live in the present, not in past (regrets) or future (fears).

Living this way allows you to really be there for your wife and kids, even if your time with them is limited (and who's isn't?).

It's not easy; my wife tells me I need to listen better and spend more time with the kids. So I've decided I'll always be growing and improving and striving towards becoming present in day to day life.

What also helps; exercise, trying to eat right, having fun and pursuing things you are naturally drawn to.

When you can be present, it benefits work, too , because you are able to put your all into your work. That makes family time flow better because it becomes easier to drop the work stuff when you've really 'beared down on it' all day at the carwash or wherever. I'm far from 'there' yet. My wife reminds me of that pretty regularly!

 

[bigleo48]

I think the ADD thing is bang on. I've never been tested, but I've always been figity and get bored easily. I guess you gotta be a little nuts to be an entrepreneur. I think of the two pro athletes I know and they are both competitive to a fault. I guess that's what it takes to get to that level in pro hockey.

Cheers...Mike

 

[Waxman]

It is true that what some term 'add' is the hallmark of many successful people.

The rappers and hip-hoppers say "I got my mind on my money and my money on my mind". This is the way many good entrepreneurs think almost constantly. Rather than worry about too much focus on business, why not dive into it full-on and indulge yourself as much as you need to? Maybe in this way you'll be able to use that same focus when your wife's talking or your kids want to play. This, I think, could lead to your recognition of the proper time to focus on business and family/personal life.

 

[rph9168]

I often envied my Dad. He was very successful in a large company but could totally isolate his business world from home life. He seldom if ever discussed business at home. Many of his friends did not even know what he did for a living. Unfortunately I did not inherit that trait. I sure wish I did because I think life would be much less stressful on all of us if we could keep business and private life separate.

 

[Waxman]

What was your Dad's secret?

 

[rph9168]

I wish I knew. Maybe it was due to the fact that those were the days without cell phones and pagers and he couldn't be reached.

 

[Bubbles Galore]

That has to be it! I can't ever get away from my phone