Dad Joke

[Waxman]

Q: Why don't they have casinos in Africa?

A: Too many Cheetas!!!

 

[MEP001]

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, they're an efficient and humorless people.

 

[I.B. Washincars]

The Earth rotating on its axis, really makes my day.

 

[MEP001]

I can prove the Earth is flat.

The surface is 70% uncarbonated water.

 

[Greg_T]

What's yellow and can't swim.

A bulldozer.

(Not really a Dad Joke, but I've always liked it)

 

[MEP001]

I'm not a dad (as far a I know), but I like telling kids dad-type jokes. My favorite is to tell a kid a corny knock-knock joke, then after I tell it I say "I have another one but you have to start me," so the kid says "Knock knock." When I say "Who's there?" the kid looks very confused.

 

[Waxman]

I was at a diner the other day when someone yelled 'does anyone know cpr?" i said 'yes, i know the whole alphabet'

Everyone laughed, except for this one guy...

 

[MEP001]

I was just told by my doctor that I'm color-blind.

This diagnosis has really come at me out of the yellow.

 

[SoakZone]

 

[MEP001]

I keep asking people what LGBTQ stands for.

So far no one's given me a straight answer.

 

[I.B. Washincars]

People say filling animals with helium wrong.
I say, whatever floats your goat.

 

[MEP001]

A guy walks into a bar, and he meets a line of people waiting to take a swing at him.








That's the punch line.

 

[PaulLovesJamie]

What's brown and sticky?









a stick.

 

[MEP001]

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back to you?









A stick.

 

[I.B. Washincars]

When does a joke become a “dad joke?”



When it becomes apparent.

 

[Waxman]

what word actually becomes shorter by adding 2 letters to it?



short.